The other day Kelli asked me what my aspirations were. Well… sort of. Her boyfriend had wanted to know (currently all he does know is the approximate time I walk from 22nd street to Union Square every night…swear that’s not creepy) and she relayed the message. So Steve, since you’re now following me on twitter (#thanks) and may see this post if I tweet it (#mosdef), this is for you.

Aright. I have this thing where sooo many things intrigue me, adventure and the unknown provide me with comfort, and I have absolutely no ability to switch off my head that’s constantly bursting with stories, ideas, desires, and questions. And at one time, I had a long list of aspirations that filled every screaming moment of curiosity: getting a Masters in global health, signing a record deal, writing a bestseller, running (fast) marathons, making music in West Africa, climbing mountains, and winning the lotto and doing nothing but knit and build lean-to’s.

But I’ve recently realized that even if I could achieve all that (let’s be serious, I, eh..wouldn’t), I don’t know how valuable that would be. Could I put my heart into it all? Would each feat have the same meaning, or would that meaning be spread thin? And maybe even this: could there be some aspiration I didn’t even know existed? And how would I find it?

So I turn to my favorite book by Herman Hesse, Siddhartha. One of the most important quotes (to me) is, “Perhaps that you seek too much, that as a result of your seeking you cannot find.” And I think for a while, I was constantly seeking out a certain goal (or seven?) and became tunnel visioned, doing anything and everything I possibly could to attain every goal in life. And while that’s not necessarily a bad thing, I didn’t really let life sort of lead itself in a direction unbeknownst to me.

I graduated and moved myself to D.C., since I landed a job that fit “perfectly” with my Anthro major and slight obsession with African cultures. And while the Smithsonian African Art museum sounded lovely, I knew next to no one in D.C., and ended up quitting my job almost a month later in an intense, tear and anger filled meeting (woops). From that moment on, many other things happened as a result of my fierce “seeking” quest. And four jobs and probably 20 something states later, I found myself unemployed in New York City, the one place I had been trying so hard to tear away from.

But then, life seemed to work itself out. I stopped feverishly seeking, and (so thankfully) landed a job that intersected my passions, talents, and work rhythm. I found amazing people and have made wonderful friendships. And I’m living in a city that I used to hate… and then appreciated… and  now, maybe,  am slowly beginning to love. And I want Greatist to succeed beyond the success it has already gained and have the whole world see its vision—its incredible value.

And my aspiration? For me, I think boxing myself into one specific goal is just as dangerous as having too many. Instead, I’m devoting my energy to this: genuinely impacting others while staying curious, challenged, and happy. And whatever country I end up in, project I devote my time to, and people I surround myself with, I will spiral all my energy into this hope.

And climb Kilimanjaro.

About Laura

marketing director at Possible. formerly at Greatist. Still running, finding zen, and searching for the perfect bloody mary.

Posted on January 13, 2012, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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