Last year I wrote a post to go up on Valentine’s Day and never published it. Actually, I write about 10,234 things a day and don’t hit publish for various reasons. But I want to address the holiday, even if it’s a day late, and so I decided to combine my thoughts from last year with this year — an interesting experiment? (The italic text is from last year’s take on VDay.)

Exactly one year ago, I woke up from a night of heavy champagne and tequila drinking and barely made it through the day at work. I went out with two of my other single girlfriends, Nicole and Flo, and our “totally not bitter ” selves decided lots of toasting to singlehood would make our Valentine’s Day better than anyone else’s.

I have an apartment filled with lovely lady friends awaiting me (not to mention a couple bottles of champagne) and we’ll celebrate. Valentine’s Day is about love, not only romance or relationships. Just…love.

I think a big reason a lot of people hate Valentine’s Day is because they’re single. Or had a bad experience in the land of love. Of course it’s hard to admit this — myself included — but why else would you be so vehemently against a holiday that celebrates something as lovely as love? Sure, people in relationships/marriages also have free range to dislike the holiday, and many do. But for a worldthat obscurely celebrates a bunch holidays no sweat— like eating a ton of food before Lent begins (Mardi Gras) or drinking green colored beer to celebrate the death of a Saint (St. Patrick’s Day) or even eating cake on the day you worn born (you don’t even remember your day of birth…) why is it to crazy to enjoy a day where you celebrate love with… love? (Ok, and chocolate and flowers and stuff.) 

I feel like people are either real haters of February 14th, or totalllly dig it. And it’s not just those in good relationships who enjoy today, and the singles out there who despise it. I know a lot of couples that are all “screw it, everyday is valentine’s day” (aww), and single folk that just don’t care to care.

I guess I fall somewhere in the middle. Beyond the commercialism bullshit and the whole “don’t just celebrate your partner on the 14th!” I think it’s fair to say that Valentine’s Day is really nice. Having the excuse to lay in bed with a box of chocolates,  go out to some 10-meal prix-fix extraordinaire, order in chinese food to enjoy with bottle of champagne, or just have copious amounts of sex (sorry not sorry) is…awesome.

This still holds true for me. In fact, I think I am actually moving on to the non-haters side of Valentine’s Day. Rather, I think it’s kind of lovely — I smile when I see all the men holding roses on the subway, when couples are hand in hand looking so damn happy, and when all the restaurants have prix fix menus displayed outside. It’s adorable. It’s nice. And one day I’ll be going to one of those prix fix dinners and will probably be really happy about it. Especially if there’s tequila.

So yeah, Valentine’s Day can kind of suck if you’re single. But only if you let it.  When it comes to dating, I’ve have my fair share of breaking and broken hearts and complete and utter bliss. I’ve come out of solid, amazing relationships left with questions, anger, and a lingering sadness that can still sting. But hasn’t everyone? I’ve also tried my best to remember the unique, beautiful moments and be thankful. I haven’t regretted a single relationship because at the time it was right— it had to be— and I was happy. And from every relationship, I’ve grown. I’ve figured out what I want, what I need, what I can’t stand, and what I should stay far, far away from. Dating is a learning experience, and, well, I’ve learned quite a lot.

So with that, Happy Valentine’s Day (a day late…) from my 2012 and 2013 self. May you love yourself and those around you, and may you fully recover from all that sugar you downed yesterday. Myself included.