As an end note to my last post, the Greatist team took a trip up to the Catskills for a retreat this past weekend. (Or, as we like to call it, “Gretreat.” We tend to put “Gr” in front of most words. Grot it?) It was a wonderful mix of brainstorming and hard chilling, morning runs and meditation, cooking together and drinking by the fire. I loved “living” in an old house with 12 other friends, talking about everything from our families, to not-so-sober college days, to how we’re going to change the world with the company. It was a special weekend.

We came back to the city Sunday afternoon, and after four days of relaxing, I was completely…. exhausted. I fell asleep from 2-5pm, which is unheard of for me, and woke up with what felt like a ton of bricks on my body. I got up and went for a walk around my hood, picked up some seltzer (<3) and spent the rest of the evening catching up with friends, writing, and reading.

Oh, and getting super excited about my marathon. And… super nervous.

I go back and forth in regards to what I want out of this race. A year ago, I would have never thought I’d actually be running one, and crossing the finish line would indeed be a feat within itself. And of course that still rings true. But as I surround myself with more runners (and friends!) who are racing pros, the word “marathon” gets tossed around as frequently as “dinner.” I know a lot of people who’ve run a ton of marathons in their little lifetimes, and do it quite often. (“Hey, want to go out tonight?” “Sure, let me just run a marathon and then I’ll meet you there…”)

These people absolutely AMAZE me, and have helped motivate me to run longer, train harder, and sign up for races. This marathon became less intimidating, and way more feasible, and seemed (almost) as “easy” as  making “dinner” with friends.

But I also don’t want that to disappoint me. As I’ve written about before, I started created expectations and times I wanted to crush, became super competitive in my own head, and almost set myself up for disappointment before getting to the starting line. Sure, I’d LOVE to BQ, and I honestly think I have it in me. But, I may not. It’s not because I don’t believe in myself, I just am being realistic, and I know how many factors go into a race. (Just pray I don’t go out in 7:30, Marjorie and Jocelyn have helped me big time with this one!) I also know I was injured just a month ago, and that my training was side-tracked, then rushed, then..

Regardless, what I’ve decided is to simply run it. And try to love every ounce of it. Go out conservatively (840-9 min miles) and try to pick up the race. See what happens, and go by feel. And along the way…enjoy the beautiful scenery, enjoy the race, enjoy the moment. Namaste, if you will.